Time is a cruel unforgiving mistress
wow my brother was telling me this joke and he said
"if you’re fighting with a woman and she pulls a knife on you, just pull out the bread and cheese and meat and her womanly instincts will kick in and she’ll just make you a sandwich"
then all of a sudden our mom emerges from the kitchen holding a huge ass knife and she approaches my brother asking “sorry what was that?” and he started screaming
100000000 points to mom.
Injecting Plasmids? The Bible said Adam and Eve, not…
this is literally the best pick up line on a tshirt i’ve ever seen
That awkward moment when you leave a store without buying anything and all you can think is “act natural, you’re innocent”.
Black people probs
Oh shit this too real…
Too damn real
I wish people could just say how they feel like ‘hey I really don’t like when you do that to me’ or ‘hey I’m in love with you’ or ‘hi I really miss you and i think about you all the time’ without sounding desperate why can’t everyone be painfully honest and just save people the trouble
Angelica summing up what having responsibilities really means.
how many of us, as children, have had creeping thoughts of “i think i have a crush on somebody of my own gender” or “i wish i were the other gender” and dismissed them so swiftly and so effectively because those ideas were unnatural and unconscionable that they never had the chance to grow into our identities? how many more of us, when finally told from childhood that queerness is a real and good option, will be queer and will love it?
things you don’t point out about people:
- body hair in places you’re not used to it being???
- fat rolls/curves
- how much/how little they’re eating
- how skinny they are/what bones they can see because of how skinny they are
- How fat they are.
- If they have crooked or misaligned teeth maybe even yellowed
- If they sweat a lot
don’t do it
look at me
getting a note on a super old post